When will I feel better than I do today?
When can I stop have crying jags in front of my daughter?
When will I stop feeling like the worst mother in the world?
When will I feel real joy again? Without effort?
When will A sleep again so I can wake up feeling like I'm starting the day at least at a 3 instead of 0?
When will I not have overwhelming anxiety?
When will I be able to visit a doctor and not be assaulted with memories of all the bad news?
When will I feel like I am strong enough to handle my grief and a 2 year old?
I know I can't be the old me, but I need to be a better me for my daughter, when will that happen?
When will I stop having so much fricking guilt over everything, including my parenting, that if guilt were calories, I'd weigh 500 lbs.?